in cold blood cupcakes [attempt 1, harhar.]

Earlier this year, my younger sister came upon an image of these cupcakes made especially for the premiere of the final season of Dexter. She immediately put her request on Facebook (of course) and wouldn’t shut up about it. So I promised the cupcakes would be baked for her birthday, and they were! Of course, the sugar “glass” toppers I needed to make I did not have previous experience with, so THAT is why this has been labeled ‘attempt 1.’

the original cupcakes, courtesy of Magnolia bakery, NYC

People fake a lot of human interactions, but I feel like I fake them all, and I fake them very well. That’s my burden, I guess.

-Dexter Morgan

I think Michael C. Hall’s character is identifiable moreso than with other fictional killers because of his almost complete separation of himself from his true reality vs the perceptive reality he carries out with the world. It’s easy to slip into his shoes as a person living a double-life because many of us do so already, but to maintain such a distinction between what is expected of yourself versus your most innate urges… but I’m STILL behind and only on Season 2, so I’m sure there’s much growth and depth I’ve missed out on. On to the cupcakes…!

They may appear to be difficult, but honestly, the only complications arise with the sugar “glass” shards. And if you’re a chicken like me :bwark bwark!: you’ll overcook the sugar somehow and come out with “glass” that looks more like pure white meth. NOJOKE.

[Maybe I’ll make them in blue for a Breaking Bad watch party. Or just ’cause.]

The cake is a simple Devil’s Food Chocolate cake — any chocolate flavored cake will do. OR… GENIUS! You can combine a white cake with a ‘skin’ food coloring…to make it look as though the skin of the cupcake has been pierced… yes?!

stuffed and ready to be covered in white icing

all gathered, ready for the slaughter…

lonely, I am so lonely.

reflecting upon the self. oh yeah, it’s a cupcake.

dunzo.

I feel as though these need “Psycho” music in the background.

For the filling:

– 0.5 can of cherry pie filling (perfect for the tangy tartness needed when biting into this sugary treat).

– 0.5 cup of fresh or frozen strawberries. If using frozen strawberries, make sure any excess liquid has been drained before pulsing into a liquid.

Mix the cherry and strawberry components and set aside until cupcakes have cooled. Once they’re ready, scoop out the middle with a small spoon or melon baller, then fill with the bloody filling.

[I have read other strawberry fillings using the processed glaze you can find in the grocery store. That stuff is TOOFRIGGIN’ sweet, even for me.]

The frosting is a simple white icing, and if you’re pressed for time, it’s no biggie if you end up grabbing a can of ready-made frosting from the baking aisle.

:looks down at feet.:

Moving on! The sugar “glass” recipe is one I found on Martha Stewart’s website; as it turns out, even the Queen of DIY wanted to make these cupcakes.

Sugar “glass” recipe a.k.a “Martha’s Caramel”

– 1.5 cups granulated sugar

– .75 cups water

Mix the sugar and water in a deep saucepan and mix while boiling until the sugar has dissolved. Then let it cook until the mixture has a slight golden tint to it. Go any further with the heat and you will have some legit caramel, so take it off the stove. Have a cookie sheet ready and pour the sugar mixture onto the sheet. It should be shallow so the “glass” can be thinner, and therefore, more transparent.

It will take only about 30 minutes to harden, no refrigeration necessary, so once done, you can lay a towel over the “glass” and whack away to create the pieces of shards.

I added the “glass” shards to the cupcake via insertion and laughing evilly (not really ok maybe), then spooned some “bloody” filling over the sugar pieces to appear as though the cupcake has been cut! Ohnoes..! The filling being more liquid-than-solid also helps in selling the whole dripping-effect. SO something went right.

my little pretties. careful not to cut your mouth, or worse, fall into a sugar coma.

If you decide to make these (before I get a second chance, that is), please DO let me know how yours turn out?!

-Nita

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